I’ve come to the realization that the weather directly affects my outlook on my unemployment. I know it sounds weird, but it has become painfully obvious this week. Lets be honest, spending 40 hours a week alone could get to anyone. No matter the amount of distractions I put in front of myself, at the end of the day I am basically left alone with my thoughts. I’ve had inklings that I am more depressed about unemployment on rainy days, but only this week going on my fifth straight day of POURING RAIN, with no hope of clear sky in sight is it really sinking in.
On a nice day I feel motivated to jump in the car with Oly, head to the state park and walk the grounds for hours. I am breathing in fresh air, watching my dog flip out with excitement in a new environment, and actually saying to myself that unemployment isn’t half bad. Look at me hiking on a Tuesday, this is the life! I’ve spent a nice day lounging in my backyard in a bathing suit reading with Oly sleeping next to me. I’ve enjoyed watering my plants or planting new flowers, and even running errands feels enjoyable when I’m bathing in sunlight. Sunlight has come to equate an overall feeling of, “I can tackle unemployment.”
But all that positive energy is gone in a flash when I’m faced with five straight days of downpour. Rain so intense that even walking to your car will result in being soaked. This rain is hitting the pavement and then jumping back up at me. People this rain attacks you from top and bottom. It’s not right. I mean, I’m a Washingtonian damn it, I can handle a light drizzle. But this, this rain, this is NOT a drizzle and I am NOT a fan. This is me revoking my residency.
In drizzling rain I will still take Oly on a walk, I will still run errands, still participate in life. But rain like this, I can’t hack it. Going on my fifth day of downpour is making me stir crazy. I can’t take Oly for a walk, I can’t step outside without being drenched, I can’t tire Oly out and make her less manic, errands make me feel like I am being assaulted by the heavens, and in the end I just resort to holing up inside. I want to be outside, I want fresh air, I NEED MY VITAMIN D DAMN IT!
At least in the winter you set yourself up to know it will rain X amount of months. You accept it, you hunker down, you adjust. But spring, spring is skitzo. One minute I’m tanning in my bathing suit, hoping to be unemployed for the rest of my days, and next it’s raining so hard I can’t bare to even go outside. I need consistency people. Either that or a vacation to the tropics.
ANYTHING to alleviate this insanity.