OK, that’s not even a true statement, I guess goodreads HELPED me look like an idiot. In all reality, I was the captain of this ridiculous train.
Here’s the deal, when I got all excited about my new Library page a loyal reader (I think, my memory is fading with age) told me about goodreads. A site where you list and rate the books you’ve read, become ‘friends’ with other book nerds, recommend books, join groups, basically it is the really nerdy version of Facebook. Without the coolness.
I signed up for it because obviously I am the queen of cool.
There is this feature in goodreads where in an effort to expand your friend network it links to your email and sends a, “Join me on goodreads!” email to the people of your choosing.
So, I pick 6 of my equally nerdy friends. These people have ether told me they like to read, are in my book group, or were in an English class with me in college.
Book people I AM PERSONALLY FRIENDS WITH.
People I wasn’t embarrassed to write, “Hey, sign up with goodreads and then we can be book nerds together!”
Yes, I wrote something that lame and sent it to 6 of my friends. Because, I thought they would understand that I was making fun of us for being so nerdy. But, I also knew they would run out and create a page, because as I said before, we’re nerdy.
But then something happened. Goodreads didn’t think I asked enough people to be my friend or something, maybe goodreads though I was being shy about my love of literature and it wanted me to branch out, shout at the top of my lungs that, “I LOVE BOOKS AND I DON’T CARE WHO KNOWS!” because they decided to send out my personal invitation to EVERY SINGLE PERSON I HAVE EVER SENT AN EMAIL TO.
Take a second and think about that. I am getting emails back from HR departments saying, “Thank you for your resume, we’ll get back to you in 5-10 business days,” because their automated system thinks my email was a resume. But those aren’t too bad because they’ll filter it and not give my spam a second thought. But what about the people I had personal email contact with while I was unemployed? People where I was one step away from getting a job? People I had hoped to impress?!?! What about college professors? Teachers Assistants at UW? College hook ups? Family members? All the millions of emails I’ve sent and received when I’ve sold shit on Craigslist?!?!?!?
I know you people, so you’re shaking your head and telling me to get over it, and really I didn’t think twice about this either at first because I assumed people would think it was spam and delete it, but people are emailing me back! My inbox is full of emails that basically go, “Why did you spam me? Who are you? What is goodreads? And why do you want me to be your friend?”
And the kicker? These emails are usually followed by a goodreads confirmation that this person is now my friend.
I am now looking at the book recommendations of the guy I sold my bike to on Craigslist.
Do I really want to know what he’s reading?
But after spamming him he took the time to make a profile, and accept my request, and now he wants to be book friends together and I can’t seem to turn him away. He likes books! Score one for literacy! Who cares if he’s reading Going Rogue and gave is 5 stars, there has to be a way to hide his updates right? RIGHT? TELL ME I CAN HIDE HIS UPDATES!
The emails just keep coming days later, and I think my favorite is the person who after I apologized for accidentally spamming him replied, “Well now I’m intrigued, what are you reading?”
I guess it’s not all bad, some of the people in there were actual friends of mine I was too embarrassed to send the email to in the first place who I am actually really happy took the advice of my spam and signed up. And if I end up with a few extra friends on there who might have been interested in buying my truck from me in 2007 I guess that’s ok right? Because when I think about it, each time I get a new ‘friend’ goodreads sends me an email and actually congratulates me on becoming more ‘popular’ (their words, not mine), and lets face it, who doesn’t want to hear on a daily basis that they’re becoming more popular?
*At this point I feel like I should ask you to be my friend too because if the Comcast customer service rep is going to be my friend, the least I could do is ask the people who might actually KNOW ME to share with me their literary preferences.*