The Accidental Olympian

SEWARD, AK THE ZOO EDITION

Friday morning my mother and I had a reservation for a half day kayaking trip in Resurrection Bay in Seward, AK. 

Fun right! 

First I get a migraine on the drive down and my vision blurs and I start seeing spots. Not good, but my Mom and I switch places and I can rest my eyes and try to regain some sense of normal vision while she finishes the drive. Then about an hour later as we're looking for our kayak tour place I notice my index finger is numb. Then my index finger and the tip of my second finger. Then my eye. Then my cheek. Next the right side of my tongue, etc. etc. At this point my mother is freaking out thinking I'm having a stroke, and I'm just trying to convince her I'm ok, just slightly more numb for the wear. Basically, I wasn't giving up on this damn kayaking trip for no stinking half of my face going numb! 

Thankfully the numbness passes, after of course I'd suffered more loss of vision, and a temporary change in my hearing (seriously falling apart) and finally I've convinced my mother I'm ok to head out kayaking. 

And I'm so glad I stood firm because after the numbness and all the other crazy migraine symptoms passed the kayaking was breathtaking. 

Plus, we got to take embarrassing pictures with kayaking skirts! How could I miss that?

Once we were in our boats the wildlife decided to come out and play. First there were the salmon that were throwing themselves every which way that was pretty spectacular, and then all of a sudden my mom spotted dolphins. They were a smaller species than I'd seen in the waters of California or Hawaii, fast little pods that were clearly enjoying all the salmon around us. And, in the picture below they look like, well, a far far far away bump. But I promise, dolphins! 

 

Then, because we CLEARLY hadn't had enough adorableness in one day we began spotting sea otters. Which it turns out could care less about people and are content to put on shows of extreme preciousness for all who would like to see. 

Hello there Mr. Sea Otter! Can I take you home with me? Oly and Stella will love you.  

 

Just when it seemed the day couldn't get any better what with the wildlife, the beautiful green water, the glaciers sparkling in the mountains and the fact is was NOT raining, my mother spots something she describes as looking like a water poof about 50-75 feet ahead of our boats. All three of our boats stop paddling, we're dead in the water scanning the horizon to see if what she thought she'd seen was really possible. 

Our guide had informed us that seeing whales, especially humpback whales in the bay was highly unlikely, so I'll admit more than one of us thought my mother was off her rocker. 

Then, not more than 25 feet in front of my tiny, flimsy, plastic kayak it surfaced. 

A humpback whale in all its glory a mere 25 feet from my boat. 

We all screamed, and as it took a breath and went back under we suddenly realized this massive animal, capable of knocking us into the water with little to no effort was directly UNDER OUR BOAT. 

This isn't some cute exaggeration my friends. 

As my mother and I looked over the side we could actually see the water displacing below us as the whale moved directly under our tiny plastic boat. It looked as if a submarine was pushing the water some 20 or so feet below us. And we had no idea if he was going to keep going, or come up for another view. 

The look on our guide's face was what keep me terrified, instead of reassured. You could tell she was trying to stay calm, to keep us calm, and oh SHIT it was not working. 

She calmly instructed us to all tap lightly on our boats, to let the whale know we were above him (OMG HI MR. WHALE DO YOU HEAR ME UP HERE? STAY DOWN! STAY DOWN!). Meanwhile my mother quietly hyperventilated, and when we were all sure the whale was long gone, we all started freaking out. 

Happy, scared, amazed, all six of us in the group talking a mile a minute we quickly came to the realization that we had just had a truly a once in a lifetime experience. 

I'm extremely lucky having lived my entire life near the ocean in some capacity or another, and so I've seen many whales from either the comfort of a car (we saw the illusive white whale on our drive to Seward!) or boat, but never have I had a whale swim directly under me. Not off to the side, not 200 yards in front of us, under my boat. 

It's something my mother and I will never forget. Mostly I regret that I didn't believe her first claim of spotting the whale. Had I had my camera at the ready maybe I would have captured this truly phenomenal moment. 

The moral of this whale of a tail (GET IT? I crack myself up!) is that if you're ever in Seward, AK I highly recommend you check out Adventure Kayak Worldwide. And if you go and check out their homepage, please take note of the picture of the humpback whale throwing its zillion ton body out of the water and then imagine me in my tiny kayak next to it.

As I sat silently in my kayak, waiting to see where the whale would surface next, all I could picture was that beast giving us his best free Willy, and landing right on us. 

Thankfully, he wasn't exactly in a jumping mood. 

BUSY BUSY BUSY

YOU GUYS!

I have been doing so many amazing things. I've watched chick flicks with my mother, we've walked the dog, shopped, kayaked with sea otters, dolphins, and a humpback whale. We've spotted the endangered Cook Inlet beluga whale, and hiked to the top of an old ass glacier. 

I hate that she's leaving. 

And I can't wait to share all the amazing pictures and stories with you. 

OH, and thank you for your anti-rain wishes because you guys, it's been SUNNY! 

I can't believe you guys worked your magic. 

Who did an anti-rain dance in your yard? 

OUR FIRST VISITOR

My mother is coming to visit on Wednesday making her our first official visitor to our new home in Alaska. It's no real surprise she was first to come check out our new home seeing as from the moment I arrived I began sending my mother and father text messages, emails and phone calls filled with reasons why they needed to come see me this summer, instead of their proposed long visit next summer. 

So when a friend of my mother's spotted a deal on Jet Blue that was cheaper than I've ever seen tickets to and from Alaska, she was IN! 

Prepping for a family member to arrive is always a little stressful. Even more so when you're planning for them to visit you in your new home in some far away location. Of course I want my home to be clean, and of course the dogs will make sure that no matter how much I sweep the floor it will still be covered in a fine layer of fur. There are other things I had hoped to achieve before my mother's visit as well. Things like procuring a new bathmat for the guest bathroom, but I guess the folded towel on the floor will do for now. Or the blackout curtains she specifically asked for... Well, that blanket we nailed to the wall should work really well in keeping out the Alaskan sun. 

What can I say? I'm keeping it classy in Alaska. 

Mostly though I've been focused on the weather; hence my inability to procure basic home improvement items. Turns out August is not that warm summer months of long gone May and June (which just so happens to be when I convinced her to come visit). We'll have three days of rain, then one and a half of sun, then back to rain, then the sun peaks out for an hour so you head out with the dogs on a walk, only to be drenched 20 minutes in. Basically, August is an asshole. 

So combine the weird weather with the fact that 90% of the things I want to do with my mother while she's here involve being outside, I'm watching the weather app on my phone like a crazy person. 

On Friday we're leaving to head south to Seward, AK, this ADORABLE fishing town with the intentions of a four hour kayak trip and a small hike (PLEASE NO RAIN), walking around downtown exploring (would be much more fun without rain), and a 8.5 mile strenuous hike to the top of Exit glacier (holy crap this would be miserable in pouring rain). In the right weather these activities would be truly perfection. In pouring rain, I'll want to kill myself. 

So yeah, right now it's all about precipitation people. 

Please send your anti rain thoughts my direction. 

Or else at the end of my mom's visit I'm going to have a lot of pictures of me soaked and miserable in the great Alaskan wilderness to share with you. 

And no one wants to look at pictures of me looking like a drowned rat. 

I hope. 

GRADUATIONS, KARAOKE, & THAT TIME WE DRESSED MY DAD UP IN 70'S GARB

That's pretty much what I've been up to. 

Post over. 

You can all go home now. 

This week is insanity. Three cities, two states, no sleep.

I was recently in Eugene, OR where I celebrated for the longest two days EVER my sisters graduation from the University of Oregon. Being a University of Washington alumni I have been trained to hate the University of Oregon, but I had to hand it to the Ducks, they sure beat us Huskies when it comes to graduation ceremonies. 

Would you rather sit for 6 hours in either pouring rain (as seems to happen most years) or in the beating evil sun (which happened to my unsuspecting family) to watch a bunch of people graduate? Remember, you'll be sitting there for SIX HOURS. 

OR, would you rather sit in a nice covered section for 2 hours? 

TWO HOURS PLEASE. 

For two days all I heard was, "Emmaly this graduation is SO MUCH BETTER THAN ASHLEY'S GRADUATION." 

I get it family. I'll alert the UW about your grievances pronto. 

 

There were the traditional college graduation moments. Walking through campus, the taking of a million photos, the running to the front to film my sister getting her diploma, the making fun of bad speeches, the laughing hysterically as they mispronounced Emmaly's first and last name (which I think means she doesn't have to pay back her student loans, right?), graduation lunches and dinners full of congratulatory toasting, and the best part where a selection of overly dressed family members hit the country karaoke bar till 1am. 

I have officially decided that all family events are 700 times better if you all end up singing karaoke till 1am. Talk about family bonding. 

Oh, and while in Portland last night my mother and I took my father to a vintage store where we picked him out the BEST OUTFIT EVER for his 40 year high school reunion. 

I couldn't help but be jealous. 

What the hell would I wear to my 40 year high school reunion? 

WHAT CLOTHING ARE THE EARLY 2000'S KNOWN FOR? 

Nothing. 

That's what. 

In Southern CA in 2003 we wore jeans, Reef flip flops, and tank tops with zip up hoody seatshirts. 

Wow. Wont that be fun to pick out at a vintage shop in 30 years.

WHO KNEW YOU COULD PULL YOUR MIDDLE BOOB WHILE BOARDING

I was going to give you a detailed account on what exactly I'm doing with these puppies, but then my sister and I went snowboarding.

And then I woke up the next morning and realized that I haven't worked out in over three months and that every single muscle in my body suddenly hates me and I could hardly sit upright, let alone follow through with my eggtastic plans.

 

Please tell me what part of snowboarding requires me to use the muscles between my boobs. When turning? Getting on and off the lift? While hanging out in the bar? 

Also, who knew you could pull the muscle under your jaw, from snowboarding. Turns out you most definitely can. And when you do, it will suddenly become very hard to hold your head up all the way. 

The only thing I can conclude from all these weird sore muscles is that either A. I am really really really really out of shape, or B. I look like a dying chicken while boarding which is why I managed to injure my jaw and middle boob while snowboarding. 

Jury is still out. 

 

 

In the meantime, enjoy this video. I had a fancy shmancy HD helmet camera with me that died about three runs into our trip. Meaning our only footage was us on the warm up hills. Which makes us look like lame sauce sissy wimps. Guess we can't all be bad asses.